Attempted Murder Suspected at the Jonas House this Week
By Factoid Sally
Things started off rather strange at the Jonas house this week. The school bus and car pool had arrived but both drivers were standing outside the vechicles. They both drove off and the drivers walked off the lot. Luckily a new bus and carpool arrived moments later.
The cheating ways at this house haven't tapered off yet.
Parker has hooked back up with his high school sweetheart Amy Jones, former papergirl.
Lexi could be seen romancing...
While her poor daughter cry out of exhaustion in the bathroom.
It seems that WooHoo took a lot out of ol' Parker.
Lexi has a secret want to WooHoo with 20 different people.
If you'll remember she's already done it with her deceased husband, Myrin Jonas and Myrin's brother Parker, which produced little Ivey. By the look on Lexi's face, we can guess she's made Abhijeet (we'll call him Abe for short) her third.
IN the meantime, or between WooHoos, Devon had a birthday.
He's a strapping young lad with aspirations of Popularity. It appears the news reported in Prosperity Falls about it being odd that Pop. people want to own 5 top level businesses is in fact false. Devon has not yet worked towards this goal.
Speaking of odd things, Parker wants to get a facelift, that's a new one on me.
Meanwhile Lexi seduces and...
...beds Parker's son Jack Jonas.
She later found out she was pregnant.
And what did she do next? She seduces Claire Morreli Skywalker much to the dismay of Mirrabella Morreli, although I'm not sure why she is SO upset.
*Side note: There are SO many affairs going on is this hood, I can't keep track. Oh wait I remember this one now, I'm not telling though.*
She later beds Claire as well. Lucky for Claire, she had a want to WooHoo, the whole week at her house.
Lexi took a break from bedding the locals to help her little one go from Panda PJs to...
...um are those supposed to be bananas? Ivey looks so much like both her parents she really is going to be gorgeous.
Shortly after that Lexi was back to her old tricks and bedded a college friend, Sherri.
And back to bedding the elderly she went.
This time is was "happily" married Bastain Bach. I guess 10 kids can do that to a man, or he's a bastard, it's up to you really.
That night Lexi suddenly realized her Myrin was dead and how much she wanted him to come back.
She still bedded Goopy though, yes folks, Goopy. You know you knew whose shorts those were in the picture above.
And Parker helped his daughter with her homework. Then everything went black and there was something about a really bad Windows error. Yeah whatever that means, and these things all had to be redone, 3 days worth.
Stella brought home Stella Skywalker from school. These two really seem to get along.
Ivey brought home neighborhood social butterfly, Keenan Bach. I wonder if we're seeing 2 sets of future mates. Well that's not my call, I need to stick to the facts, I am Factoid Sally.
Lexi was in the middle of a date with her next victim, well willing subject as the case may be, Xuan, when she went into labor.
She had baby boy Fern.
It wasn't until later that she admitted who his daddy was.
Well most people would be upset if the woman they were on a date with had another man's baby, but not Xuan. I bet he was just happy it wasn't his.
Caleb Bach happened by that day and was very upset to see his Father's (Bastain) mistress on a date with another man. I did say this place was odd.
Well Lexi wasn't too happy that Fern dirty his diaper as she was trying to get it on with #9.
After changing the diaper, Lexi put another notch in her bedpost.
The following day Ivey brought home her first A+ report card.
She was very dismayed to find her mother on a date with another man. How could she cheat on her father like this?
That little bump in the road only slowed her down. She got #10.
While all of this was going on Moonchild celebrated a birthday quietly in her room.
And she helped Fern become a toddler.
And helped with the potty training.
The following morning #10, I mean Quavi picked up a shovel and filled in a hole left by a wolf.
Speaking of stepping up, Lexi helped Little Ivey with her cooking.
And little Fern with using the potty.
At this point she seemed to have realized that she was neglecting her family. She invited over good old #3, I mean Abe.
She knew it was time to do the right thing and proposed to Fern's father.
This was the beginning of the bad things for poor Abe.
They had a quite ceremony in the house so no passer-bys would ruin it.
The look of "What have I done," says it all.
Abe took to practicing his speeches in the mirror.
When he could speak no more he went to this crazy electric pail thing and got in. He almost electrocuted himself to death, but survived.
The next day he spent sometime practicing on the piano. Moonchild said it was getting cold so she lit a fire.
Meanwhile Lexi discovered she was expecting. But rumor has it the baby isn't Abe's. I hear she had a romp with one of the other's she had bedded previously, just prior to the wedding. Who? I'm afraid I can't say, I have to stick to the truth (no cheating anyone, Cait, you have to wait to find out like everyone else)
Well apparently Moonchild got hungry and started grilling inside. Old age, I guess.
Next thing they know the whole place was a blaze. Everyone was OK.
Later another fire broke out when Moonchild grilled Hotdogs. She claims she thought they would be less flammable. Abe caught on fire this time. He was a goner for sure.
Until 2 firemen showed up and put him out. The piano and grill were lost in this fire. Abe was alright.
Shortly after that the cowplant was mysteriously found by the house. It had been moved from it's safe spot by the pond. Abe still smelled so bad, even the cowplant wouldn't eat him. Heartburn. So who was trying to off Abe? The police believe it was Moonchild. It turns out her and Abe were also in love. Him marrying Lexi was too much for Moonchild to take and she started to try to rid the house of him. Unfortunately there is no actual proof. She claims the grill said it was approved for indoor use and that she has no idea how the cowplant got moved.
Ivey tried to bring back who she believed was her dad, Myrin. Poor girl, how do you tell her, her Uncle Parker is her father? Well I guess if she reads this I just did. The phone wouldn't work though. It kept beeping, "No Actions Available".
She did get a glimspe of him though by shouting "BoolProp" into the night air.
That's it for houses, now I just have university left. Hopefully that will go quick. I was going to bring Myrin back, but the grim phone would not work at all. I used boolprop to get another with the same problem. I tried to add Myrin to the family but the game just said he was dead, well duh.